Saturday, October 26, 2013

Emily speaking on her life and family

This is my latest video uploaded to my Emily youtube page which I will use more in addition to my Ed youtube page. I talk about my current situation, my family, my son, transgender, autism, depression, suicide, family tragedy and my desire to heal and continue to advocate for my son, care for my family, keep our house and maybe oneday be recognized for my writings, videos and knowledge and my unique charm and charisma. I really am a "cool" person if you got to know me. All I need is time and I will do my best for my son, my family and in advocating for him, for autism, for me, for transgender and the LGBT community and hopefully touch one person's life aside from my son, my family, my friends, my colleagues in a positive way as others have touched me including people I never met.

                                   "Little Eddie" with mom knowing then of my "big secret"

This is a collection of some pictures I included so you could get to "know" me a little bit and see my beautiful family. I have a wife, son and our mother-in-law, who watches Matty when he returns from school and we are lucky she is here to help and be the glue to keep us still going as a family.


Ed in disguise

Matty as a young kid

                                                                A young Matty

Matty and Dad (me (Ed))

Matty and me at Montauk Point years ago

Matty and Dad (Emily)




Matty after the blizzard of Christmas 2010

My family at Niagara falls with Matty's "girl pal"

Ed or Emily (you guess)



My family at Christmas posing for our Christmas card for 2000

Matty and his cousin Kathryn


My family at Niagara Falls, Ontario

Maria and me

emily on about me
Hi! I'm a very complicated person but it wasn't my intention. I'm just trying to be who I felt I was since I was 4 years old. I'm now living as Emily. I have some wisdom to share I learned as a child.
It is very true what my parents told me when I was a young boy and I have held those words of wisdom close to my heart never losing sight of it. My dad once told me that when a young man grows up, faces his life as an adult he will face the world with many choices, He will encounter challenge, disappointment, joy, accomplishment, sorrow, heartbreak, celebration, loneliness, friendships and a drive that comes from within that makes everything possible. My mom, being the sensitive and caring one always told me to always have love in my heart and never lose sight of my dreams and my hopes. She always said that we live our life in God's image and he has a plan for all of us and when we learn this then we will go out into the world and do all the good things we are supposed to do and we will seek a companion to share our love, our heart and our soul with. My parents both had a way of touching me with their love and their words of hope and inspiration. They had provided me a life full of wonderful and cherished memories that I enjoy to this day and it helps me in raising my son. I always knew that life was something of a mystery and just felt blessed to be experiencing it with my family and the ones I love. When I add another year to my life and share it with my family I am truly grateful and the memories of the past and the new memories will forever be a part of me and will be carefully tucked away in the recesses of my mind.
When I think back to my childhood and I see through the eyes of an adult who is now a loving husband and a very caring and devoted father I sometimes wonder how I am so blessed to still be here and to have such a wonderful family and how the time has just passed by in such a way that I find myself puzzled that 5 decades have come and gone and I still feel the same as I did when I saw the world through kid's eyes. I certainly have matured and have met many challenges and responsibilities along the way and experienced all that my mom and dad said I would.
I would say I'm living life and doing my best and sometimes wish I could do more but realize that my main responsibilities in life are to advocate for my son fully, enjoy my life now as Emily, provide for my family, be loyal to my wife and share my story.

                                                                 "Little Eddie"

"Little Eddie" all grown up in recent video today as Emily

Emily's Fashion-sense face book page

ed's (emily's) on hubpages
Selena Garcia, very talented and beautiful music artist, I love her and her music!

emily's pinterest page
                                                   Beautiful woman in a beautiful dress!!

ed's blog "A Father's Love, My son and Autism"

Emily's video discussing her son's autism
Praise from a blogger on one of my blogwritings on "A Father's Love, My Son and Autism" on BlogSpot as indicated below and I was so gracious and flattered. emily on twitter

emily ezinearticles tab

ed on youtube
My channel is to reflect my thoughts and ideas and to give transgender and autistic individuals some glimpse into my personal experiences being a MtF transgender and having a son on the autistic spectrum

Video of Matty and I driving over the Verrazano Bridge in tribute to my Dad who worked on it in the early 1960's while listening to John Denver on cd while my son makes some commentary and says something very endearing at the very end of the video that touched me and I'm sure "Pop" as well.

emily on RDIO

emily on myspace

emily on linkedin
Full time advocate for my son who is Autistic 
Levittown, New York

Now my only focus outside of addressing my own personal needs is to provide my full time and effort in my commitment to support, help and advocate for our son and hopefully it will lead to his future successes in figuring out his life and I now must take on the challenge alone with a sense of priority and urgency. For me that is a moral dilemma because I need to believe Matty will find his sense to live his life and find something to help him aspire to find his happiness and for me to not have to worry about whether or not he can. Our son is growing into young manhood but is not developing timely and we will need to allow him more time to grow without feeling pressure.

ed/emily CPA website

emily on yelp

Emily I.'s Review

  • Review from

    Photo of Emily I.
    • 6 friends
    • 4 reviews
    Levittown, NY
  • Callen-Lorde    
  • I am very fortunate to have come to Callen Lorde where I am treated with dignity and respect by all the staff and I am very happy with my doctor, Juliett Widoff. She has been so kind and compassionate to me and initially when I first visited her I came in "guy mode" in suit and tie and when she asked me why I was here I said I wish to transition form male to female as I have always identified as female from age 4. She looked puzzled as I explained I am also a husband and father. It was when she asked me to undress to check my vital signs that she realized my struggle as I had a very pretty dress on underneath with stockings and then she proceeded to give me a big hug and said she will help me transition. I was eager to start on female hormones immediately and told Dr. Juliette I was self medicating with premarin. She advised I wait two months and then she placed me on estradiol and spironolactone to help assist me medically in my transition from boy to girl. I was so happy I learned of Callen Lorde and find they are wonderful and a good place to be for acceptance and understanding. Hugs and Kisses!


ed on about me
I have been very reflective on my life of late and of all the dreams and hopes I have that I still would like to accomplish before I cross that bridge into the next part of my journey. I am a proud son, a proud father and I have been very lucky in my life. I have learned a great deal from my mother and father who always taught me to believe in myself and to never be afraid. I am very inspired by the memory of my parents and all they have provided me growing up. My dad was a proud iron worker who worked on many buildings, bridges and skyscrapers that dot the New York City skyline. He was featured in a book written by Gay Talese called The Bridge, in which a full chapter was devoted to an experience my dad had while working on the Verrazano bridge. It was October 9, 1965 that seemed like any other day but this day would change everything for my father. As he went to perform his job on the bridge after talking to his friend and colleague only moments before he heard screams from his friend who lost his footing and slipped as he tried to grasp hold of the catwalk. My dad looked over in horror as he tried to grab hold of him. As he tried to pull him up he almost went over as he had saw visions of my mom and I as a young toddler and all he remembered was realizing his friend falling through his hands as he did not have a firm grip and he being pulled also and going over until he was saved by the fast actions of another ironworker who saved his life. My dad was never the same after that incident seeing his friend and colleague fall to his death.
My dad was very courageous in his life and he managed to stay strong as he worked on many other projects including the World Trade Center. The day the towers were struck by terrorists and went down he was truly heartbroken as he relayed the memories he had of working on them as we spoke over the phone that fateful day in September. I will never forget that conversation for as long as I live.
My mother has taught me to always be patient, understanding and to always believe in myself and to never give up.
I am the proud father of a son who is diagnosed with autism and I write a blog titled "A Father's Love, My Son and Autism. It is a collection of our experiences in trying to help our son and stand by his side to help him to be strong, to believe in himself and to be happy.  

ed on facebook

Engineering Wonders facebook page by ed/Emily

emily on blurb

Autism-Insight facebook page by ed/Emily

Autism Insight is created to help learn and gain knowledge in understanding Autism and help my son to live a fulfilling and happy life and share my views, writings and hopefully help others in their situation. My goal is to help my son and others.

Autism Vision group on facebook by ed/Emily
My life is an enigma and I am still trying to figure it out and am fighting depression, suicide ideation, transgender struggles and fighting for my life and helping my son.
To all those dear in my life,

Starting Wednesday, September 5, 2012
I am celebrating a new beginning in my life and hope all my family and friends will welcome me, understand me, accept me, tolerate me, put up with me, laugh with me, cry with me, celebrate with me, have fun with me, inspire me, be inspired by me, pray with me, talk with me, sing with me, dance with me, dine with me and most of al...
...l enjoy being with me. I am trying to be as sensitive about this as i can but also feel the need to express myself as Emily. It's been a lifelong struggle and journey that is now only beginning and it will be a rocky road at best but it is a road I must travel and hopefully will traverse and still come out of it with all my family and friends intact because without my family and friends this all would be a pointless exercise and a tragic one at best. I want it to be a celebration! That is how I look upon my transition. It is a passage for me and one I've always known I would have to face. Thank you to all my family and friends for your kindness and your understanding. I have cried many times about how I would come out and when would be the best time. To be honest i wished I had done this years ago but the realities of life precluded me from doing so. I also will tell you that I am blessed as being transgender because i have had a life filled with many joys as Edward Iannielli and would not trade that away for anything. I married and became a father and was so inspired to tell that to the world through my blog. It is my proudest moment in life. I am also very moved by all who cheer me on and who touch me with their kind words of inspiration and their concern for my happiness and my personal welfare. I am chartng new territory and would be foolish to think naively that everything will be perfect. I know that is my hope but I can't say that it will be perfect because I have no way of knowing that. I do believe however in my heart that things will work out and I will be accepted completely as Emily. For me it has been 47 years of patiently waiting wondering if i would ever be Emily. I can now proudly say it will happen but I am only at the very beginning stages and I have so much to do in the transition process. It does not happen overnight. It is a progression that happens over time and the typical time frame from your true comittment to it can range from 2 to 5 years and it is a very expensive process for which I am not able to afford it all so i will have to forego some things but will try my best to transition in a positive way because this is me. I can not change that. I tried, believe me I surpressed this for my whole life but came to realize i was only hurting myself and why would I want to do that. I am tired of crying. I want to smile and laugh now and finally be free of the pain I have endured. An emotional pain that runs deep and that no one can understand unless they walk in my shoes and feel what I feel. That is hard to truly know so I will have to relate it in a book so all can understand it and maybe i can help someone out there who truly needs help. i will tell you this which pains me to do so. We as a community, the transgender have the highest suicide rate of anyone. Many of us never find the strength to tell anyone or embark on transition because we are deathly afraid for fear we will lose everything near and dear to us. It is the biggest gamble of our life when we choose to transition and those who do really have no choice. It is a matter of life or death. I certainly will tell you that from my own personal experiences. I have come a long way and now realize that I am ok and I will be ok and I will still have my family and my friends because my life means something to me and to others and I am grateful for that.

emily's facebook fan page

About Emily's Fan Page on facebook

I am a transwoman and I will be living the rest of my life as Emily and I am so happy and excited. I owe this to my family, my employer and my friends.
I am the father of an autistic son who is my pride and joy. I am married to Maria and we are loving parents to our son. I am transgender. I am a CPA. I am a dedicated father, a dedicated husband, a dedicated employee and a nice person. I am transitioning to live as a woman full time.

A-Transgender-Life by Emily

About Emily's "A Transgender Life" on facebook

I am transgender and I have now come to accept it and am now at peace with it as I transition from male to female. I am working on writing a book and lending a voice to this community. I have struggled with my situation for a lifetime and wish to help myself to finally find happiness, be there for my family and to try to help others who identify as transgender. We have to be strong for each other.

                                                Emily speaking on Transgender Part 1

emily on reverbnation

emily on wordpress

emily on youtube
Hi! I'm Emily; I'm in the process of transitioning from male to female. I have a wife and a son I love. I've been transgender since the age of 4. I'm finally on the right path in my life. I have the support of family, some really good friends and I am dedicated to my career as a CPA but currently under medical care for my transition from male to female, my severe depression which led me down a dark path where I attempted suicide on a few occasions in regard to my current status of not being able to work, my facing imminent foreclosure, my worrying about my teenage autistic son and providing for my family. I worked hard all my life & I have nothing to show for it but a broken down spirit. I feel the school is not helping my son to the degree he needs. I'm very lonely, isolated and the only things keeping me going are my son, my family, my medical team at Beth Israel Medical Center, Callen Lorde & my writings and videos and social media & the friends I met here!
Love, Emily
Emily speaking on Transgender Part 2

emily on last fm

emily on BlogSpot

emily on tumblr

emily on google plus
Hi, My name is Emily, I am a "dad", "husband", CPA, Advocate for autism, transgender and depression support, I am a male to female transgender coming out and living as a transwoman since last year at age of 51. I feel like a teenage girl since going on HRT a year ago.
I was selected to a contest sponsored by intuit and I am a long shot but just being a consideration makes me feel good. Thank you Intuit for consideration for the earlier rounds. Now the competition becomes intense. It would be cool if I did go all the way because I am the longshot, the underdog, the Cinderella story but I do in fact have a story worth telling and sharing and I am also struggling to weather the adversity and health problems I currently face. I literally am fighting for my life and my son's life and I am overwhelmed and if anything else bad happens I will probably wind up saying  farewell and checking out like my dad because I have just been depressed all throughout my life and pretended I was happy as a guy and although I accomplished some pretty good things and am so lucky to have a wife and son who care about me but if we lose our house I will do what I have to which is to protect my family as I learned that was my responsibility to them and I could not live with myself if they were subjected to homelessness. I am 52, suffering from severe depression, transgender, have a son who will most likely wind up in a home and will live on my SSD for his lifetime which I hope will improve for him. I am in pain and just want to finally have peace and if that means on my terms then that is what it has to be. That would be the ultimate tragedy that I would not wish on anyone. It just is so hard to survive and be optimistic during these times and our leadership in Washington is inept. 
I wish the fellow contests my best of luck!!
Video used for contest but this is in its entirety and had to be trimmed to 90 seconds, If you see the video on the link above and see this video you will notice the difference.

In closing I am sharing this last video because I feel a lot of pent up emotion and now as I experience life as a woman, as Emily I had to say what was on my mind. It is not to offend anyone but merely to share my views and frustration in losing my job, having a nervous breakdown, raising a son I love who has many challenges as an autistic child, trying to find the right residential school which may be way upstate but seem like it could be the best thing for him. I am also fighting severe depression transitioning at age 52 to finally live as a woman as I knew deep down in my heart I was a "girl" at the age of 4. I thought I would live my life as Ed until the day I died but that was not to be and I always felt guilt all through out my life and even in becoming Emily I still feel guilt as I feel I let my wife, son and family down and all I was doing was trying to find a little joy and happiness living out the rest of my life as a "girl" which I knew since the age of 4. This isn't something that just happened overnight. This was my life long struggle. I still love my son, my wife and family and will do all I can to heal but I am in need of my LTD with the AICPA and my recently approved SSD so I van hopefully address my mortgage and financial crisis but I am still awaiting the monies to come in. If I didn't have this I would probably take my life to protect my family with my life insurance as I already met the two year suicide clause. Obviously this is not the direction I want to go because I love my wife and son and I am so happy as Emily. The problem is if we are foreclosed we will find ourselves living in the street with an autistic son who is only 14 and a wife who certainly would need my payout so they can find a better house to live and I will finally be at peace and some needy patients may benefit from my organ donation consent with DMV. I am not a fan of our leadership in Washington and believe we are not well represented and I just fear for my son's future. What will life be like for him and his generation. I am very concerned but it is out of my control. We just need to help him day by day and get him enrolled in this school program so he won't face homelessness like my wife and I are fearing. If we become homeless I know for a fact I will not survive and that is the absolute truth. I worked hard all my life to be thrown out of my house. Our government and Corporate America have to start to realize how much they are truly hurting those out of work and struggling with illness.
Emily getting a little "hot' under the collar due to her recent stuggles
If I could make my son's life better we would be so happy if he is approved for this residential school which we are going to see on Monday, October 28 so we need to get on the road by 4 am to guarantee a 1pm appointment.

The school: Hillside

History 2001-Present

History 2001-present"As Hillside Behavioral Health System begins a new century, our goal of providing better services for children and families continues to shape our decisions and focuses our attention on the future. Keeping that goal at the forefront, much of our efforts have centered on building relationships and identifying synergies. As an integrated family of agencies, we are striving to reach out to our communities by developing services specific to their needs. Within each of our agencies, we remain committed to providing customized care based on the individuality of every child and family." –Allan Illig, Chair, Hillside Behavioral Health System and Dennis M. Richardson, President and CEO, Hillside Behavioral Health System, 2000 HBHS Annual Report.

If Matty is approved and he gives thumbs up I truly believe this will be a great thing!
I have to believe that in my heart otherwise what hope will we have if it is not to be. We need a miracle and we need it now! Matty needs intensive help that we just can not provide to him.



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